Day 4 of my #FATANDLOVED series, if your partner is ashamed of your fat body. If they hide you, prohibit you, shame you or hurt you they do not deserve you. Your partner should be a mirror of kindness and show your body the utmost respect. I remember a long time ago I had a…
Day 3 of #FATANDLOVED when you think of your fat body where do you feel the most safe? For me it’s held in the arms of this man. Not because he makes me feel “better” about my body or like we discussed yesterday because he loves my body and is positioned by society as the “hero” in my story but because he understands the fact that in many situations with many people I don’t feel safe.
Day 2 of my #FATANDLOVED series. Often cis-men are seen as heroes for loving Fat womxn. Either that or we the womxn are an object of fetishisation. We are seen as something taboo or unlovable. Yet we are not any of the above.
Welcome to a 5 day photo series called #FATANDLOVED which aims to show the experience of having my body loved by my partner. Not because I am fat & not in a way that fetishises my body. This 5 day photo series aims to celebrate body diversity in couples with fat partners & explores what it means to be fat & in love. To challenge the assumptions that people make & to unravel the way cis-men are often labelled heroes for giving fat womxn the time of day.
While I don’t have the definitive answer to end fat trolling, the best come back for every situation or indeed how to effectively communicate the pain of being told to ‘Switch off’ when we deserve to still be included in online discourse here are 5 actions that won’t ease our pain BUT will perhaps be able to make you move through the very valid pain you feel and find your people.
Even so, as I took on the impending change of ‘Chooselifewarrior’ I went through plenty of emotions. The name itself has become to mean more than my eating disorder recovery, more than the years spent online making supportive environments for others and it became larger than my own personal meaning. It began to take on meaning for others. It began to form support groups, it began to be recognisable in our small community. It became a safe space from diet culture, a strong space of fat activism, a word that took on meaningful eating disorder recovery meanings for many more than just I.
A lot of people don’t understand that my first consult for Double Jaw Surgery was when I was 16 years old. It was a tricky time in my life as I was still very deep in the grip of my eating disorder. At that time overall I had many fears and apprehensions for this surgery. At 16 my Jaw Surgeon suggested the surgery because of my alignment but really the only reason for going through the surgery at that stage would of been cosmetically to fix my underbite. I was not having any issues with my jaw or health problems because of it.